6137

Mind over matter. More like, Mind doesn't matter. Or Mind creates matter, including the GGGGGGG (great, gooey, green gobs of granulated gorilla grunt). Worked with GH today and got some insights into the stew that I've been cooking. Oh well, I can start from where I am--stewless and clueless. Start, restart, break my heart, not that smart.

Dreams. Always the dreaming even when I'm wide awake. Last night's dreamscapes were quite vivid. In the first part, I was riding in a convertible as the passenger. The driver was an Umberto Eco look alike. There was someone in the back seat. The faux Umberto was driving vigorously to a place in the hills. It was a community of people who had retreated to the hills and lived in luxurious houses along the ridge road. Until recently, their road was only a mud trail and was difficult to navigate in other than 4-wheel vehicles.

With the new paved road, the places were more accessible. Umberto started up the winding way. I stood up in the passenger's seat and took in the passing scenery. There was some danger that Umberto would make a sharp turn and throw me from the car, but that did not happen.

When we got to the ridge road, there was like a wall of gates that separated the houses from the road. Many of the gates had signs and banners advertising some type of order-by-mail products. Many of the places had a pyramid of goods standing in the driveway entrance to show what products were sold from this location. The wall of gates went on for miles. There were few pedestrians--most of the places looked in disrepair and were run down.

A second dream sequence took place in a software development house. We were integrating some popular cartoons into some interactive learning products. There were spinning logos and animated action on most of the screens in the place. We had just finished putting a wildly spinning logo into one segment of the code. We were viewing its actions and tweaking how it behaved.

It seemed as if the dreams took place a long time before I actually awakened. I had the dreams, noted their content, and perhaps went back to sleep for a while. When I fully awoke, I recalled the dream outlines. As I wrote about the dreams, I fleshed out the details as I could remember them. This last step just took place nearly eight hours from the time I awoke. The amazing mind, as if it mattered (that's what the mind has to say).

GH gave me some pages from Hawkins' "The Eye of the I." They relate directly to what we discussed in today's session and some of the experiences I've been having. At last, some clearing of the glop, a shuffling of the clutter. If there is no "I" then who does the Eye belong to?

Puzzlements. Puzzlements within puzzlements. The pulse of living.

I totally got today why I'm being pulled to yoga, dance, Qigong, and other restorative practices. It's instinctive, but also part of the rebuilding process. What I've torn down, I rebuild, but with new materials, new wood. Raise high the roofbeam, carpenter. Oh, yeah!

If all this doesn't make sense, it's because it doesn't make sense, even if I think it does. Thinking--the bane of humanity. Too much thinking and not enough dancing. Dance class tonight. Can turn off the thoughts for a couple of hours--or at least channel them into now, now, now--tracking the movements. Dance the night away.