5848-5847
Getting erratic with postings. Went dancing last night and got back late. Dancing was OK. Don't know a lot of the patterns so sat out a fair amount.
Came back and read a few more stories in an Elliott Perlman book, The Reasons I Won't Be Coming. One story, about a poet (I Was in a Childish Way Connected to the Established Order) who doesn't quite mesh with reality, is one of the most moving stories I have ever read.
It uses the opening lines from the Wasteland ("Let us go then, you and I...") as a repeated theme that is haunting and memorable. It's about how a person may not fit well with life, but is redeemed in a sad, but powerful way. Perlman's writing is edgy and complex, but always filled with deep emotions.
Am oscillating between the need to rest/sleep and feeling like I should be doing something, anything. Dreamed last night two different, but related, dreams.
One involved taking a couple of people on a tour of someone else's house. A labyrinthine place with many cross connected rooms and hallways. I had done (been in the house/dream) before--it was like a repeat or replay.
The second dream fails to emerge fully. It seemed to involve lots of people who were working on some major project or event. I noticed over the past few days that when I am dreaming I do not have symptoms in the dreams. The symptoms return when I awaken or come out of dreaming. I never seem to dream and have symptoms in the dream state. Interesting!
May just be coincidence or the way things are, but my thoughts want to make more of it--somehow harness the dream states to the healing process. Why not?
I also have noticed how my thoughts take any incidence I see or experience and make a story out of it--a rationale of cause and effect. It seems as if I can't do otherwise--I don't seem able to just observe--I have to add the story even though most often it's just gibberish thinking.
I had a clear moment yesterday where I saw myself juggling smoothly and actually did so. What I saw was what I did!
Not sure what's happening today. Food, as always, dominates the agenda, followed by sleep/rest and elimination. What a boring cycle of events. I grow weary of the repetition and seek diversion or difference. Yesterday, satisfied my craving for ice cream and picked up some It's It treats. Ate one and it was good! Have two more to be consumed judiciously, if that's possible.
Eat, sleep and eliminate. The two E's are connected and thus gets my more of my attention. The S part is the simplest and easiest to do.
Meet with MSR tomorrow. That should be enjoyable. Haven't seen her in ages.
On my walk yesterday, I cashed in--picked up a sheet of stamps that had been dropped. Finders keepers! They were the older 37 cent stamps, but I have a sheet of 1 cent stamps that make them work. A walkabout bonus!
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