5709

Some rain today, but sun broke through and stayed out for most of the day. Managed to get my walk in while it was still sunny.

Slept in the early afternoon and rested some while I read in the later afternoon.

I'm feeling frustrated. I'm back to doing my daily do--eat, sleep, eliminate and read--but nothing more, nothing beyond those same-olds. Plus it's turning cooler and that only makes me want to curl up, stay warm and sleep. I'm noticing that I can just make it through each day with the limited set of things I do. Going beyond those actions seems impossible or never going to happen. (I know that it's the end of my two week cycle between treatments and that I often get bleak right before the next session, but I'm beginning to wonder what I'll be doing 6 months from now and beyond.)

I have to keep looking at what I'm doing (and not doing) and wondering if this is it! If this is what I'm going to be capable of doing as time marches on. I've overcome some issues, but I'm still weak, slow moving, and badgered my annoying symptoms. I get minor breakthroughs, but nothing seems to build or accumulate.

Anyway, I'm not exactly a happy camper at this juncture. I keep expecting a breakthrough, but don't know what I need to be doing to make one happen. I just know that plodding forward is getting old, jaded and tiresome.

My digestion continues to be holding steady. In fact, I cut back on the amount of aloe vera and AG that I'm taking. It felt like it was the right thing to do and so far so good. Time for some "hummee hum, brahm, hum" and a bit more reading. (Slept erratically past night--kept waking up and had trouble getting back to sleep. Don't know what that was about.)

May my dreams help me understand what I am to do!