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Woozy, doozie. Feeling bluesy. All manner of weird sensations happening. Anxiety? Perhaps, but not clear over what exactly. L is leaving. I'm sitting her place/animals, etc. Feeling like I'd rather be hiding in my cave.

Weather is warm to hot. Adding fuel to the fire in some strange way. The tremor in my right arm continues to shake, to manifest. I smashed my finger. Just want to be quiet, sit quiet, stay quiet, be still, and other meditative actions.

Feel like the next two weeks are going to be more disruptive than normal because of being on the move, being between places. So what? What's the big deal? I don't know, but it feels like a big deal somehow.

Transfer and shift. Move and dance. Mark the patterns; row the boats. I feel like I'm exploding, expanding and inflating. Reaching out of my container. There are also the men's team meetings--two of them during this period. More to deal with; more to do. Want to not do; not move; rest.

Also feeling like I'm reacting to caffeine again. Like it's sending my systems out of bounds, off the charts in some way. Today is a lost day, a day without reason. My dreams were there last night, but boiled away in the waking into anxiety moments. Wanted to sleep this morning. Just wanted to climb back in bed and sleep, rest, recover, repair, rebate, restore.

Construction crews began their noisemaking early, at the first second of allotted times. Pound and hammer, saw and grind. Making the noises of building, the cacophony of progress.

So it is with a jumbled soul that I arrive and mark down these words, leave faint tracks across these pages. Time to shift and begin. Time to loosen all the fetters and set sail. For where, I cannot seem to know.