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Dreamless in cyberspace. Don't recall even a hint of what I might have dreamt last night.

Had brunch with my son from the South, his wife, their daughter, my daughter, and D. Good to see everyone. My daughter has been helping the Red Cross with the Katrina evacuees coming into the area.

L spent the day making Finnish pastries for a consignment she was asked to do. I've been meandering all day. I keep thinking that today is Sunday. Have nothing special to do tomorrow, but I guess I want it to be here already.

I'm feeling shaky. I've sat still too much today. Walked a bit before dinner, but not enough to take off the edge of creeping stagnation that I feel. Didn't go to the dance tonight. It might have helped like it did last night, but might also just postpone the inevitable.

I was struck at brunch by the plans everyone at the table seemed to have, except for me. My plans involve a trip next week that I'm committed to do (sort of, even that's not absolute), but nothing much beyond that. Everyone there, with the possible exception of the granddaughter, are planning, thinking ahead, positioning themselves, signing up, taking active steps into their combined and individual futures.

My plans, if they can be called as much, involve figuring out how to survive, how to carve out a space/place where I can relax and restore. I feel depleted, empty, not all that solid anymore.

I learned that my son in the East (all of these compass references are to the state of CA, which is a state in all the senses of the word) has moved. When I know not. Where I'm also unsure about. So much for communication. Apparently this took place some time ago. Oh, well! Onward to oblivion I go.

Feeling ratty tonight. Not much latitude for positive thoughts or lofty aspirations. Just looking forward to reading tonight and waking up to (finally) Sunday. Started reading an interesting set of stories by a therapist who also writes and uses narrative therapy as an intervention. The stories are like fairy tales (not like Purdy's that I wrote of before) and contain a richness that is surprising.

Didn't do any Qigong today (yet--and may not tonight as the bewitching hour looms). Picked up some toiletries for the trip. Tomorrow is telephone time--call my sister, my friends back East (now the geography shifts to TN) and so forth.

And maybe I'll recall tonight's dream scenes--as they mist and gather, coil and writhe.