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Dreamed | it was the day after Christmas | and it was. | A reality dream! |
Dreams got blended with reality events. It seemed like I was half way between dream states and waking thoughts. Strange mixture of dream images and to-do list items.
Went out for some oatmeal this morning. Cafe was not too crowded. People were sleeping in late and meandering slowly to the feeding holes. There will be more places open today.
Two weeks from today I'll be resettled in a new place, a new space. Looking forward to being there, but also carrying some uncertainty over what happens next. Symptoms come and go. Made a cup of tea last night (yesterday afternoon) to both warm me up and moderate the symptoms. Seemed to work. Shaking was fairly nominal yesterday evening and last night. Up some this morning, but reduced with Qigong and breakfast.
Wood chippers busily chomping away at tree parts. Guess the gardeners didn't get today off. Makes for a noisy wake up alarm. That and the refuse trucks with their can slammers that pick up and empty the trash containers.
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Bumped into a previous co-worker while I was downtown today. Bumped into him a few weeks ago. He said some nice things about my creative abilities. I told him that I'd introduce his son to the product development people at the toy company. His son is taking a degree in product development. Perhaps I can help him make a contact there.
An eating day. I saw the co-worker as I was eating lunch--a bowl of chicken, egg, rice and veges--oyoko don, I believe.
Now headed to L's for a reprise of the Xmas Eve dinner. Eat, eat, eat!
Had more of the leftovers from the Finnish feast. Delicious, it was! We just about finished (no pun) it off. Rosolli (I learned how to spell it correctly) was still tasty and about the only thing that was left.
Was a simple holiday weekend. No big deals. No major gift exchanges. A lot of peaceful time.
Thinking a lot about what's next. About what it is I'm going to do, going to be able to do. Still some time away from knowing what's going to be possible for me, but am assuming I will recover and go on to becoming productive again--in some way, to some degree. Wishing I could jump from now to there tonight, immediately. But, it all unfolds, it all manifests as it does, as it will do so. Feel like I'm standing on the edge of an abyss and taking a step off into darkness. Trusting, yet fearful. Willing to step into the unknown, but wary of where I'm going, what I am stepping into, onto, and beyond.
The time has come the walrus sez... There is no future time, just the yawning maw of now, today, tonight, this minute, second, moment. Collapsing in upon itself. Grinding away the logic, the reasons, the excuses, the efforting. Layering itself like blankets. Holding in the heat and banishing the cold.
Winter is a'coming in or so sings Pound. Let the storm approach. Let the thunder be heard and the lightning pierce the night. Wayward winds keep howling and let me sleep as the maelstrom manifests. No light is better than the brightness. No rain is better than the floods. Awaken, I am being told. Awaken, and take control of the clock. Don't let the hours vanish. Spin the dial by hand. Make the minutes fly. Spin the stars!
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