5047-5045

Had a kinetic dream--I was dreaming that I was in a cabin and that there were people approaching through the woods. They had flashlights and I could see them coming through the trees and surrounding the cabin. As several people walked past a window, I launched myself out of the bed toward the window. Unfortunately, I soon realized that I had literally launched myself off of my actual bed and I crashed to the floor. The dream faded as I hit the floor and rolled across the room. Fortunately, I landed softly and didn't hurt myself. What a dream!

Had an exercise session at the PD institute yesterday. It was energizing and informative. I'm happy that I have that resource. The person who wrote the Life in the Balance book (Graboys) is scheduled to come to the institute in the Fall--look forward to hearing him in person.

Talked with my daughter today. She confirmed that she's 10-11 weeks pregnant. She's relocated back to the San Jose area. She's carrying my sixth grandchild! Life goes on!

Miss my acupressure sessions. Practitioner is on vacation. I did some walking this week--but still need to be walking more. More exercise! More exercise! Move them muscles!

5050-5048

Lunch today at BH's. Salad Nicoise made with garden fresh vegetables and savory dressing! Was a treat!

Watched a third film by Sissako. It was the most overtly political of the films we've watched. It was centered on a trial of the African people versus the IMF and the World Bank. The film was filled with rich images and much more dialog than in his earlier pieces.

Weekend went by quickly. I spent a lot of it reflecting on the Graboys' book, Life in the Balance. That booked rocked me--I'm still feeling the weight of its content.

I ended up going to bed late last night. My internal clock seems to want to go to sleep late and sleep in late in the morning.

Had several dreams over the past few nights. No recollection of details, but I know that they were like replays of other, older dreams that I've had. In one of the dreams, I noticed this fact--that I had dreamed that dream before and was dreaming it again.

Dream away and let the light dispel the darkness!

5051

The Graboys' book, Life in the Balance, is incredible! It articulates many of the feelings and experiences I've had since I've been dealing with PD. He was diagnosed with both PD and dementia. His descriptions of how he processed the diagnosis and its aftermath are moving and detailed. He touches on much of what I've felt and thought about. It's the most helpful body of information I've run into since I was diagnosed. He talks about the important issues associated with having a progressive illness--what it does to the patient and to all others that are involved. Thank you Dr. Graboys!

Dreamed last night that I was involved in creating a spreadsheet that captured details of activities. It consisted of a record of different things that I was doing that included an identifying number, a title, a date and time stamp, a brief description, and other checkboxes that would help in sorting and searching through the data. It was an empowering dream--I felt positive energy in the dream.

Had a delicious lunch with BH today. GH and I watched a second Sissako film, Waiting for Happiness. An intriguing film set in a desert village on the shore of a large body of water. The film was very mysterious and filled with symbols (music, shapes, objects, comings and goings, life and death, color, emptiness and more). GH has one more film by this director.

The Graboys' book remains with me. I'll read it again! I'm sure I didn't get everything that it contains.

5053-5052

Dreamed night before last a pair of dreams. The first one involved trying to locate a bus station and catch a scheduled bus. I was looking for the place where the bus was supposed to stop. I kept driving around but could not find the station. I've had this dream before and it was like a replay of a memory more than a current event.

After a while looking for the bus station, I decided to check into a motel, get some sleep and try and catch a later bus. In the motel room, there were moments of uncertainty--the rooms were like a labyrinth with doors leading to more doors and rooms. I kept trying to find a door that led into a room where there were other people. I couldn't find such a door.

Picked up the book Life in the Balance by Dr. Graboys. It's a chronicle of his experience with being diagnosed with PD and dementia. He's a well respected medical doctor. He wrote the book from the inside out--as both a patient and as a doctor who was observing himself as a patient. I look forward to reading what he's written. Looking for some guidance/insight into my own condition, prospects and options.

Got to sleep late last night and slept in this morning. My diurnal clock keeps wanting to slip--staying up late and sleeping late into the morning. The bird of time still flies!

5055-5054

Had a tasty repast at BH's yesterday followed by a viewing of a film with GH. The film was by an African director, Sissako. The film was Life on Earth. GH picked this film/director because of his (Sissako's) Kiarostami-like techniques. Sissako's use of landscape, color, pointing the camera and letting action unfold as it will, use of extended, photographic-like shots, and letting the viewer fill in the blanks for what's happening and being seen definitely aligns him with Kiarostami. GH has other Sissako films that we will watch.

Dreamed that I was talking with someone in a company that made either toys or electronic devices. I was supposed to take samples of some existing gadgets and come up with ways to reuse them in new combinations. It was like a giant puzzle. I became totally engrossed in putting together various combinations and seeing what I could design.

Went for a long walk today--almost 2 miles. I slept in this morning, but was chased out of here by the gardener with his noise-toys. Went to the baylands. Brisk breeze and lush scenery! PD exercise class tomorrow!

5060-5056

Went to PD exercise class on Wednesday. Good session! Instructor introduced some new activities--which underscored my feeling that I need to be doing more, regular exercise. I got out and walked some over the past few days--and have been doing some stretches and movements during the days.

Had an acupressure session on Friday. Practitioner is going on vacation for a month. I will miss having weekly sessions while he is gone.

Had a delicious lunch at BH's on Friday and watched Kiarostami's "Life and Nothing More" with GH--one of three of his films that are thought of as a trilogy because of their overlapping story elements. The film was shot after the devastating earthquake that struck Iran. He captured amazing footage of the destruction and its effect on people in the remote regions of the country. It has been a treat to see so much of his work and hear him talk about how he made the films.

I've been dreaming quite a bit. Had a dream that involved creating some type of electronic device. The dream was very detailed and involved puzzle-like activities associated with assembling the devices. Not sure what the devices were supposed to do--I was just involved with their assembly.

Had a dream about being in a forest. I was with a group of people who were spying on another group. We were hidden in the woods and had devices that allowed us to view and record the other group's movements and activities.

Had several more dreams over the past few nights, but I don't recall the content now. Seemed like I had a dream about running and flying.

Read a set of stories by Yoko Ogawa called The Diving Pool. Eerie, slightly disturbing stories that involve repression and subtle cruelty. Heard about a book by a doctor who was diagnosed with PD and dementia--about his inner journey of dealing with the illnesses as both a doctor and a patient--the doctor who was watching himself (the patient). I'll be getting a copy of the book from Amazon (it's not in the library yet).

Continue to research and investigate how I'm to proceed--what it is I can be doing beyond my current stasis.

5061

Dreamed last night about world events of the past 7 or 8 years. For some reason, I had dreams that were like video replays of things that happened over this time period. The scenes were detailed and quite vivid. There were scenes from 9/11/2001, the start of the Iraq war, times I spent at work (NetSchools, LeapFrog), my illness events, and more. It was like I was sitting in a theater and the movies were playing one after the other. When I awoke, the images persisted for a while.

I had a dental hygiene session today. I'm still getting a lot of tarter and plaque buildup. Plan on going to the health food store tomorrow and seeing what remedies they have on the shelf. I'm tried of wrestling with this issue. There has to be a way to stop the dental problems. I've been dealing with these problems for over 40 years! I see a dentist 4 times a year! And I continue to have problems! It is tough, but it's enough!

PD exercise class tomorrow! Seems like I went to last week's class yesterday. How time flies!

5063-5062

Had lunch at BH's today (tasty treat!) and watched a Kiarostami movie with GH.

Stayed up late last night. Dreamed a lot but lost the dream contents when I awoke. Feeling fairly good but also feeling antsy--tired of being tired. Tired of spinning along in the same cycles. Ready for a shift, a change. To what, I'm still not clear.

Lots of uncertainty in the world right now. Financial markets tanking--banks being propped up as people line up to retrieve their deposits. Magazine cover appearing with a tasteless cartoon. Madness!!

Got a package of old photographs from my daughter's mother. Some great images. Good memories! Life goes on and on!

5067-5064

Where did the week go? Several days (daze) gone by--the clock keeps turning, the sky keeps burning.

Dreamed last night that I was starting work at a school or research facility. I was responsible for knowing where everything was--all of the equipment. I started by going into a large warehouse and organizing everything that was stored there. I then went to the other buildings and did the same thing--inventoried, identified and organized everthing. It was a satisfying dream--putting everything in order. At one point, I was in my office which I had cleaned and disposed of the clutter. I was sitting at my desk looking out over the complex. Everything felt good!

Got some more old photographs of my daughter today. I was in several of the photos. Took me a while to recognize when the pictures were taken. I looked really relaxed and happy! Nice memories!

Had a good session at the PD clinic on Wednesday. BH made a great lunch on Friday. I watched a film with GH afterwards--a movie by a Japanese director who was mentioned by Kiarostami as being on of his influrences. There were echoes of K's work in the film. GH has a couple more films by the same director--Ozu. He created a lot of films especially after the war.

5072-5068

Heat returns! Temperatures soar! Smoky air! Fireworks and flames!

Went to a July 4th party with GH/BH. Was fun! There were people there that I knew--that I hadn't seen in years. Small world!

Been dreaming every night. Have a stack of them from the past few days. Dreamed of being in a house that was sparse and uncluttered. It was a huge place. A long building that stretched into the distance. Everything was made of wood. The floors were polished and very clean. I was in the place, walking through the rooms. Everything looked bright and well taken care of--there were no people.

A second dream involved being with a huge number of kids. They filled the place and spilled out onto playgrounds and fields. There was some kind of celebration underway. Everyone was happy and joyful. The dream was bright and lively.

A third dream involved a vehicle that was like a mobile home, but one that had no wheels. We were moving it along a street. The sides of the object came down almost to the pavement. We had ropes tied to the thing that we were using to pull the vehicle down the street. It moved along fairly smoothly, as if there were wheels or rollers hidden underneath the thing.

A fourth dream involved being with a group of men and their sons. We were gathered in a large cabin. We were sitting in a circle. Each person carried a large stick or stave. We were waiting for a few others to arrive. Everyone in the circle was seated on the floor. Some of the stragglers started to arrive. I got up and went to the door to admit the latecomers.

All of these dreams were quite vivid and filled with details. All of the dreams evoked anticipation--about what was never clear--but as if preparations were underway for some future event.

Had lunch at BH's yesterday. Watched a film with GH--a documentary about Benjamin Smoke, a musician who developed his own unique style of rock music. It was a moving and artistic piece of film--which evoked a deep sadness for Smoke, who died from drugs and AIDs. His music is haunting and visceral.

Finishing up the User Illusion book and trying to stay cool! The heat goes on!

5074-5073

Dreamed that I was running. I was on a trail through the woods. It felt good to be running. I could feel the cool air on my arms. The running was effortless. It felt like I could run forever. There was someone running with me. It was a man, but he was like a shadow--I couldn't see his face. The dream persisted as I awoke.

I awoke early. Had an acupressure session. Watched some of the Wimbledon semifinals. The William's sisters will be playing each other in the finals (Saturday). Men's semifinals are tomorrow with the finals on Sunday.

Enjoying the User Illusion book. Lots of interesting research results that tweak my thinking bones. Will be going with GH/BH to a 4th July party tomorrow. Will watch some of the men's semifinals tomorrow. And the beat goes on!

5076-5075

Dreamed last night about making change. I was at a cashier's station in a cafe or store. I had given the clerk a $100 bill for some purchases. There was some confusion about the amount of change I was to receive. The clerk kept counting out the change, but when I tried to verify the amount I kept coming up either over or short. The clerk would recount everything and then I would check the results. The results would still be off--either too much or too little. I finally got tired of the repetition and awoke from the dream.

Watched Baghdad Cafe yesterday and Kiarostami's ABC Africa today. Somehow, I don't think I'd ever seen all of Cafe--it was a treat! Kiarostami is a master. ABC Africa, a documentary, was mesmerizing--he is so talented!

No PD exercise class tomorrow. Will work out on my own and maybe do a walk on the baylands. I felt really good this morning while I was doing laundry. Remembered other laundry days where I didn't feel so good and had to struggle to get it done. Things have changed--for the better.

Have an acupressure session on Thursday and may go to BH's/GH's on Friday--the 4th of July.

Air is much cleaner! Still a lot of fires burning in Northern CA, but winds are pushing the haze inland and away from the coastal areas--thank goodness!