4222

Halloween! No ghosts or goblins! Guess I'll have to personally eat the treats I picked up for the revelers.

CW dance class tomorrow plus reading from Ishiguro novel with GH.

I'm still feeling fairly well. Some slight regression today, but still pretty good overall. Did grab a short nap in the late afternoon. Got a couple of calls from friends (PH and LL). LL is planning on moving back from HI--she's looking into San Diego. I think I would find it difficult to move away from HI (if I lived there). But different strokes for different folks! SD's weather is a lot like HI so it may be a good choice. SD is a nice area of the state/country.

Some lucky person in Michigan won the MegaMillion lottery! I was sure it was my turn but I guess the winner's list got amended. Perhaps on a later draw.

4223

Had a good day! The lighter symptoms continue. I didn't nap today although I did get up late. I can tell I didn't nap but I feel good. It's as if something's turned the corner and I'm on a new basis. May whatever's happening continue!

Dreamed last night that I had a batch of clothing that had mold on everything. The mold was reddish in color and was on most items that I owned. There was a second dream that involved me trying to communicate to someone. However, we couldn't communicate. I kept saying things that didn't seem to make sense to anyone, and they were saying things to me that I didn't understand. It was a disconcerting dream.

Watched a movie called the Crimson Tide. It was a thriller involving a nuclear submarine that was called into action by a nuclear threat. The sub lost contact with the command system and was in danger of preemptively launching missiles. The new commanding officer refused to execute the launch and took over the sub. It was a tense story that might well have happened prior to the change in the system that put missile control in the hands of the president.

Halloween is upon us! Wonder if any gremlins will stop by tomorrow night. I don't think I've ever had anyone play trick-or-treat since I've been here. I have some treats just in case. I can always enjoy whatever is not taken.

4224

PD weight training session today. Felt the burn from hefting the weights. Felt good!

Got up late and went back to bed for a short nap. Feeling good today--like in the past few days. Slept on my left side again last night and slept well. Overall my symptoms are lighter than they've been--without altering my medication dosage. Why? I'm not too sure but I'll take it.

Dreamed last night that I was in a school filled with middle school students. There was some activity going on that required each student to have a plastic strip that identified the student. In addition, there were 10 questions written on each strip that each student was to answer. Each student had a unique set of questions that had been personalized for them. There was some confusion that required one of the teachers to use a public address system to try and locate particular students. Despite the intermittent confusion everything was, for the most part, going well.

It's raining right now. A gentle sprinkle tapping on the roof.

4225

I had a very good day today. I think it was partly due to my discovery that I seem to sleep/rest better on my left side. I slept deeply and didn't awaken in the middle of the night with my body trembling. I felt really normal for most of the day. I did nap in the afternoon (on my left side). I seem to be clearheaded for a change and in my body comfortably.

Had a good movement class today. Ate well and motored through the day.

Watched a horrific Japanese movie--Audition. It was a thriller that was really dark and dreary. The woman in the film was brutally evil. It is probably a good Halloween movie, but I don't think I'll screen it again.

PD weight training tomorrow. Ready, set, lift those weights!

4226

Cold and shaky today! Fall weather rules the symptoms. No PD exercise class today so didn't move around a lot.

Went to the H's for movie night. We watched Amargosa--the biopic about Marta Becket. The film is a bit spotty, but the woman's story is unique. It shows what the human spirit can accomplish no matter what the circumstance.

I slept in this morning and napped later in the afternoon. My symptoms are more present than usual. Wrapping up in the warm bed seems to help. Can't beat the heat! I forget how it is when the weather cools, until the weather cools. Then it gets my attention.

4227

PD dance class today was all about rehearsal for the December showcase. Not as much moving about so was a little boring. Excitement will build as we get closer to the date.

Dreamed last night about being in a house where there were prowlers moving about outside. I had a small puppy who was no help with guarding the place. I kept getting up and checking doors and windows.

Had a big lunch today--spicy chicken with vegetables. Felt good to eat a warm and piquant meal. Cool weather prevails. I napped some in the afternoon. Had trouble getting up this morning.

Watched a classic movie tonight--Madame Curie. Starred Greer Garson as Madame Curie. She was quite good in the part. It was interesting to learn about the Curie's struggle to isolate radium and the price they and others paid.

4228

CW dance class today was sparse. Quite a few people didn't show up. We learned an old waltz by Neil Hale--the Beaujolais Waltz. It's not a hard dance but it has a tricky stutter step that breaks up the rhythm. Only three more classes and then a long break for the holidays.

Watched a set of BBC episodes from The Perfect Spy. Dull pair of scenarios that don't make a lot of sense without watching the whole series.

I slept for several hours in the afternoon. Can't seem to get enough sleep no matter what I do. I just want to snuggle under the covers and dream the time away. Did dream a lot but don't recall the details.

PD dance class tomorrow. Had a slightly difficult time moving my legs in dance class this morning. The cool weather and the lack of movement over the weekend made me feel a bit slow and stiff. I was having trouble moving sideways while doing a chassé.

4229

Mailed in my ballot for the November elections. There were a hoard of propositions with their usual cryptic descriptions and supporting materials. Several involve raising fees or taxes. Not something that looks that likely in the current economic environment. But I'm all voted--results next week.

Watched a biopic tonight about Marta Becket called Amargosa. She's an artist, dancer, musician who settled into the desert area of Death Valley and restored an old performance structure. For several decades she has been restoring the opera house and doing performances there. She came there in her 40s and has stayed on as the driving force behind the restoration of a place where she expresses her artistry and talent. She's now in her 80s and still going! Quite a story of someone who was raised and was successful in New York and gave it all up to pursue a dream.

CW dance class tomorrow. Looks like it will be a rainy, misty day like today. I slept in late and napped in the afternoon as well. Ah, sleep! Can't get enough of that sleepy time stuff!

4230

Nothing much to report. Did laundry and ran some errands. Felt fairly good today. Getting acclimated to the cooler, rainy weather. Got a call from GH--he can't make it to Monday reading. He's got a doctor's appointment. Got a call from LA--she's settled in to her new place and new job. She wanted to get together but it wasn't a good time for me. I had just eaten a big lunch so couldn't join her for a late lunch as she suggested.

Dreamed last night but don't recall the details. Woke up to the sound of rain on the roof.

Will be filling out my mail-in ballot tomorrow. Will be a good rainy day project. Getting close to election time so need to get it done. Not excited about the issues or candidates, but need to make my vote count.

Abundance! Need to identify where I've experienced abundance as a result of being diagnosed with PD. Is a challenge! I can't seem to come up with anything. Perhaps I'll dream something I can share. Let there be dreams of abundance!

4231

Acupressure session felt so good this morning. The day was cool and gray when I awoke. I would have liked to stay in the warm bed and not venture out into the rainy mire. But, I got up and out and the treatment was wonderful. I also went to the PD weight training class. That proved to be a bit of a stretch and I was wiped by the time we finished. It felt good though.

It's still early tonight but I think I'll have to head for the bed anyway.

Will do laundry tomorrow. Not exactly something monumental. Just a task that must be done.

I'm feeling like the sands of time are flowing away, faster and faster. I want to hold on and slow the passing down, but I can't do it. Each day I think more and more of how time's trickling away--how I'm not doing anything of import or consequence. Just treading water! While the current is carrying me along! Another day, another way! 'til human voices wake us and we drown!

4232

Had breakfast with RB this morning. It was good to see him. He is doing well. I got up at 6AM which was really early for me. I got a nap before heading to the movement class and I also napped in the afternoon. Getting up early disrupted when I took the morning medication. I noticed the shift throughout the day.

I dreamed during the afternoon nap. It was a dream about doing a stage production. We were rehearsing and blocking out the scenes.

In the movement class, I showed everyone how to incorporate some waltz steps into the floor activities.

Have an acupressure session tomorrow and a PD weight training class. Life goes on!

4233

PD exercise class today. Large number of people attended. We went through an exercise of creating ideas for a MIT project where students wear items that restrict their movements. The thought was that we might give them ideas for experiencing PD and its impacts. Meanwhile, we each had a leg weight strapped on our weakest leg. By the end of the session, I was happy to shed the leg weight.

Dreamed a complex dream last night. It was inhabited with a lot of people including DH, a person I knew when I was much younger. In the dream, DH had all kinds of schemes for grabbing some motorcycles and zooming about the city. There were parties and stunts, escapades and events that were edgy and titillating. There was one scene where a woman was walking through a party crowd completely naked. As she went by, she said something that was vulgar and lewd.

Off to the H's tonight for movie night. Meeting with RB for breakfast (really early tomorrow morning). He's in town on business. Will be good to see him and visit for a short time.

4234

PD dance class today! It had several new people so it was a big class. Everyone there makes it a fun and comfortable session. Several regulars were not in attendance. People come and go.

I dreamed night before last about being in a performance. We were all sweeping our way across the stage. There was some mix up regarding who had which broom. We each were supposed to have a broom but somehow there were more people than brooms.

I think I dreamed last night about being in a classroom. I slept in really late and had to hurry to get to PD dance class on time. I ended up sleeping for quite some time in the afternoon. Got a call from RB--we're meeting for breakfast on Thursday morning. Haven't seen him in a while.

Early to bed tonight despite afternoon nap. Will read myself to sleep. PD exercise tomorrow!

4235

Dance class (CW) went well today. I was a bit slow getting up. The cool weather wasn't conducive to jumping out of bed. But, I made it up and got to class on time. I felt good moving and dancing. Had lunch with GH and then read another chapter of the Unconsoled to him. Reading went better but I still got tired with just one chapter. I came home and napped for a few hours. I awoke feeling groggy and dull. I felt better once I had some dinner.

Watched a short film by Bunuel--Simon of the Desert. The film was supposed to be the first third of a trilogy. The other two parts were never produced. Learning more about Bunuel in the special features was better than the film. He became a key presence in films made in Mexico. His films produced a lot of controversy and the disputes followed him around for most of his career.

PD dance class tomorrow. Moving makes a difference! Keep on moving!

4236

It's turned cooler and it's rained some today. On the level of nothing's ever right, I'm feeling the coolness a lot. It's not really all that cold but my symptoms are like it's the dead of winter. My bowl of porridge is never just right! Come to think of it, I did have lunch at Goldilocks today. So there is a connection between things after all. Or not!

Dreamed last night that I was on a huge carnival ground. We were part of the setup team and were busy putting up tents, assembling seats, and doing other tasks. At one point, all of the cars, trucks and caravans that were parked in one area were moved. They were all there and then they were in another part of the complex. We took breaks and got fed in some tents that were set up to feed people hefty meals.

Watched a mystery/thriller I'll be Seeing You. A well done drama about a woman who becomes entangled in the quest of finding whether or not her father is alive. It had some clever twists and turns. It sent my pulse up a few settings with the scary parts.

CW dance tomorrow! Already dread getting up in the cold morning. I'll acclimate eventually. Will put on some layers to fend off the chills.

4237

Lazy day! (as usual) Weather is much cooler today/tonight. Made it out and about today doing errands and such. Picked up some new library books, some DVDs, and other stuff.

Didn't nap today (since I slept in really late). Hmmm! But I think I remember napping some--maybe not! Day is a blur (as usual). Seem to remember dreaming last night but nothing recorded in my dream replay synapses.

Watched an Iranian movie--Men at Work. It's by a student of Kiarostami and a Kiarostami script idea was used as a starting point for the movie. The director used a lot of K's techniques and styling. It was an absorbing film and the acting was really natural and believable. It's a short film. The key actors all had interesting faces--striking in some cases. On minor actor looked like RS--he was a RS's doppelganger.

Bumped into JVR today. He's looking a bit tired, but he's still an inspiration. He's confined to a wheel chair but it's almost like it isn't there with him. He talked about getting back into swimming so he gets some aerobic work done.

I saw two people I once knew from long ago. They didn't recognize me but my face recognition software is still working. I'm not sure of their names but I totally recognized them. He was walking slowly and she was using a cane. They've gotten quite elderly it seems.

4238

PD weight training session today! Using the heavier weights makes a difference. Definitely know that I'm lifting weights.

Day seemed to go by quickly. I didn't really do much but somehow the time zipped by. Didn't manage to take a nap in the afternoon. Will be heading to the bed early tonight.

I must find some solution to my troublesome affliction--some way to finish out my time productively. I manage to get through one activity each day, but that effort is only a fragment of the day's duration. There are so many other hours not accounted for. And there is a growing list of undone tasks that I never seem to address. Hours, days, weeks, and months fall away like ashes. The tapir of time burns away, leaving charred and incomplete memories. Muscles, joints and sinews tighten and grow weary as does the ability to think clear thoughts. I seem to have forgotten much more than I can recall. The past is indistinct and clouded.

4239

Long day--did not nap. Went to movement class, did some errands, and grabbed a bit to eat in the afternoon. Caught up on several TV shows. Watched them in the afternoon as the heat kept rising. Supposed to cool down some this weekend.

Watched Polanski's film Knife in the Water. Good film! The story dealt with three people who meet and end up sailing around a lake for a day. For many reasons the boat trip is not all smooth sailing. The mood of the film is dark and tension-filled. It was one of his early films but it has striking shots of the three actors--up close and personal. It's almost like the camera is a fourth person in each scene. Beautiful black and white production.

In an interview with the director about the film, he remarks that he was not a fan of Dogma--the Polish film movement. He said he preferred a steady camera image--not one that looks like the cameraman has PD or is masturbating while shooting scenes. He's direct. Have to say that about him.

PD weight training session tomorrow--lift those dumbbells!

4240

Still warm today--more than warm--hot! PD exercise class seemed to help symptoms. I spent the afternoon driving GH about. He is full of stories.

We picked up some movies. We watched Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill. Astounding flock of parrots that live in San Francisco and that had become tame enough to be hand fed by a man who spent some time with them. A moving film about the lives of those birds and the man who noticed them.

It's been a long day. Have a movement class in the morrow. Let there be coolness soon!

4241

The Chilean miners are being brought to the surface. Amazing rescue effort! Sometimes there are miracles! Welcome back everyone who's been trapped in darkness!

Dreamed last night that I was with a group of people. We were throwing blobs of putty onto a wall. It was some kind of contest, but I'm not sure what it was all about. I just remember wadding up globs of putty and throwing them at the wall. The wads of putty made a smacking sound as they hit the wall.

PD dance class today! The showcase we are planning to do is going to be rich. The rehearsals are a bit boring and also somewhat difficult for the people who are less mobile.

Hot day today! More of the same tomorrow! I thought it was going to cool off. The temperature went the other way. I continue to feel somewhat flaky--tired and anxious.

Watched a good Japanese film tonight--Firefly Dreams. It's a modern film and was shot in a lush mountain area of the country. It's a film worth seeing again.

4242

Went to the CW dance class this morning. It was a solid 1.5 hours of movement. Toward the end, I was getting tired. Went straight from class to the H's. GH and I went to lunch and then came back to his house where I read the opening chapter of Unconsoled. I read it aloud and found it a challenge to make it through the opening section. My voice was starting to fade toward the end. Will be interesting to see how that activity continues.

Dreamed last night that I helped a group of people recover a treasure. There were a hoard of gold coins hidden away. We had a map that would lead us to the treasure. We formed a convoy and went to the spot indicated on the map. We found the coins and retrieved them.

A second dream involved a bunch of kids who were playing near an open culvert. The culvert formed a slide that let the kids get to the other side of a hill. The kids were busy hiking up to the culvert and sliding down it to where it emerged on the lower part of the hill. It was an active dream and very clear.

I'm feeling really flaky. I'm tired and achy, and feeling anxious and fed up with my routines. I continue to put off doing things that need to be handled. I just go from point to point, doing the same things over and over, hoping for a shift or change. I can't seem to muster enough energy (resolve, intention) to do other than what I keep on doing--which is not really all that much. I continue to dwell in an imagined future where things can only get worse. As I was leaving the dance class today, I saw an older man (older than me) who was bent over and had a paralyzed hand. He was unloading his wheel chair from a van. He had a lift device that he controlled to lower the chair so he could get into it. It was difficult to think that he had driven himself there and was successfully struggling with the chair so he could probably have lunch at the senior center. The time and effort that he had to expend to just come and go had to be incredible, yet he was doing it. I can only think of myself ending up like him--what seems to be so far away also seems to be so imminent. PD dance class tomorrow! Moving on!

4243

Slept the day away! I slept in this morning since I got to bed later than usual. Got up and ate some breakfast and then went back to sleep. Awoke around 2:30PM and managed to get out for a late lunch. Spent the afternoon listening to NPR and watching some TV shows on the Internet.

Dreamed last night and today that I was in a huge crowd of people. There was some confusion regarding tickets, but that got worked out. I kept seeing people I once knew. It was like a reunion of some kind. There was food, drink and entertainment. The dream went on for quite some time--in dream time of course.

CW dance tomorrow! Will be good to dance and move. Busy week on the way!

4244

Did laundry and slept today. I was awakened this morning with more repair work being done next door. Someone was hammering something, loudly. I got up eventually and made a laundry run. Laundromat was not too crowded so was in and out in good time. I went out for a bite to eat and came back and napped.

Went to see a Theater Works play with the H's tonight. We saw a comedy called Superior Donuts. It was fairly funny but the sound levels and accents made it difficult to hear what was being said. Since my hearing is such that I penetrate accents fairly well, I was laughing a lot more than others who were having trouble with the accents. Overall though, the play was not all that solid--it felt as if it were assembled like a Lego construction. Everything fitted together but it still didn't seem clear and propelled. Can't complain though since we were comped on the tickets.

Today was a full, long day. It's been the most active day/evening I've had in a while. Everything seemed to work out well. I was a bit frazzled by the activity and the crowds, but overall it as OK. My back is stiff from yesterday's weight lifting session. Torqued my back muscles a bit. Feels good when I'm horizontal--and it's near that time!

4245

PD weight training today was "weighty" to say the least. I used some heavier dumbbells and I can feel the difference. They were only 5 pound ones but they felt a lot more than the 3 pound ones we have been using. We also kept the leg weights on longer than usual. By the end of the session my muscles knew they had been used.

Watched a movie tonight--The Messenger. It was a film about the military process of casualty notification. It was an emotional roller coaster of a film. Strong points to be made and they were made strongly. It was not an easy film to watch.

Dreamed last night about being in a large audience or event of some kind. There was a confusion regarding tickets. Everything worked out in the end but it was not clear that was going to happen.

Yesterday, when the guy was being questioned about his being around the apartment complex, my symptoms really flared up. Tension and anxiety seem to magnify the symptoms. I'm starting to notice that the symptoms are becoming more present. It appears that I need to increase my medication. At some point, the medication will not keep the symptoms in check. That seems to be the case with several people in my PD classes. Time will tell!

4246

Had a small movement class today. There were only three of us--the regular instructor is on vacation.

Some excitement in the apartment complex today. A man on a bicycle went down the access lane that leads to the rear lot. Everyone in the complex is on edge from the person who was discovered peeping in the bathroom windows on the lower units. This guy today was acting oddly. I watched him pedal past the place and looking around. One of the men in the lower units challenged the guy. He claimed he lived up the street and went home to get his identification. He came back and stayed around until the police arrived. It was an odd reaction. I'm not sure what the police determined. I believe they let him go after checking his identity. He seemed oddly cooperative and was very talkative with the police. It might have been just a coincidence that he was messing around in the places where the peeping tom was observed. It also may not be a coincidence. We shall see!

Weight training tomorrow. My back is achy and tight. Hope lifting weights helps ease the discomfort.

4247

PD exercise class felt good today. It was a bit strenuous, but that's what it needs to be.

Watched the movie Fifth Element tonight with the H's and E. I'd seen it before, but it's an entertaining film. Lots of tongue in cheek sight gags and dialog from other movies. Lots of obvious Star Wars allusions. Hundreds of other inside visual/verbal elements and such. The woman who starred in the film, Milla Vovovitch, was a world famous model who is now both an actor and a music creator. The IMDB file on the film has dozens of trivia entries.

Will chase down other films that she has acted in and that the director has done.

I am fading! It's been a long few days. Movement class tomorrow!

4248

Good session of PD dance today. We are starting to rehearse for our dance event in December. I was picked to be one of the principal dancers since I'm slightly more mobile than many of those in class. It is going to be fun. Looking forward to getting ready for and doing the event.

There was a police helicopter buzzing overhead this afternoon. Apparently, there was a search going on for a crime suspect in the area. The copter was flying really low and broadcasting what was going on to people on the ground. It was like being in a war zone.

PD exercise class tomorrow and movie night at the H's. Early to bed tonight!

4249

Learned a new dance in the CW class today called Toes. It's a Caribbean beat and is fun to dance. The class was not as full as it could be. For some reason, several people did not show up. Makes for more room on the floor.

Watched a movie called The Invisible. It's done by the people who produced The Sixth Sense. It was about a guy who almost gets killed and his killer, a woman, helps save him in the end. He astral travels throughout most of the film as a disembodied spirit that no one, but his killer, can sense. The story/premise is a bit like the movie Ghost, but not quite as compelling.

The apartment renovators in the next door unit were loud and noisy this morning. I was awakened to the pounding of hammers, buzzing of saws, and the clunking of feet thundering around the complex. I was glad to be up and out earlier than usual with the CW dance class.

4250

Watched a film called The Small Back Room (aka Hour of Glory). It was a romance/war film done in England around 1950. It is in b/w and is a suspenseful movie about a man who worked in British research trying to understand and keep ahead of Nazi technologies. The film was directed by a pair of acclaimed directors (Mitchell and Pressburger) and was one of the last they did in b/w. They did The Red Shoes. Some of the information on the special features section of the DVD was interesting.

Talked to my daughter today. It's her birthday tomorrow. She's 28! Turn around and she's 2, turn around and she's 4, turn around and she's 28! Many happy ones for her!

CW dance tomorrow (early start time). Nice to have cooler weather. It even rained a bit this morning. Let there be rains! We need the moisture.

4251

Rested a lot today. Slept in late, went back for a nap after breakfast, and nodded off in the late afternoon as well. I did get out for a bite to eat between reposes and grabbed some things from TJ's. It was cool today which was welcome.

A couple of the apartments had steam cleaners here today. They interrupted my naps with their loud, noisy equipment. And the kids were on high decibel levels.

Watched a film noir Nightfall. It starred Aldo Ray and he was terrible. He had a fairly long career but I don't think he was ever a star. In Nightfall, he seemed stiff and wooden, disconnected from the scenes.

It seems my dreams are missing seams, but are not obscene, yet still I dream!

4252

Weight training went well today. Felt good to pump some iron and work on balance as well. New instructor is good and it's great that he's being made available. It's still a small class but that's not all bad for now. Weather has really cooled down. It's nice to not be roasting as the day goes by.

Watched the rest of the Repentance movie. Overall, I give it good scores. It's definitely a quirky film but that makes it interesting. Some of the special features on the DVD were really interesting--like the short documentary on the well know Russian actress who appeared in a cameo at the end of the film.

I'm feeling well but I think I'm going to have to increase my medication dosage. I'm getting off periods during the day and evening that are leaving me feeling jittery. I think it has to do with the medication not being as effective as it once was. I've been on the lower dosage for several years now. Exercise and movement still seem to moderate the symptoms and I could try increasing those activities first. The trick is to make the time to do so. Always something new!