5745

Hot! Hot! Hot! A spate of warm days have slipped into the queue and are heating things up! In a hundred years, this place will be underwater.

Nothing of major import to report for the day. A day like most of the 180 days just logged. Digestion still on track, but getting bored with current cuisine--but sticking with what works!

Spent a bit of time crawling craigslist just to see what's happening in the rental markets--and to start looking for a quieter place. Lots of options in Gilroy, Watsonville, Morgan Hill, and Santa Cruz area. Unattached units on ranches and such. With prices less than what I'm paying now (which is really low for this area, but is noisy--even as I post).

Anyway, nothing to be done right now, but in six months my lease will expire and I'm sure I want to move--no matter what state I'm in physically, etc. May the stars be my guide!

5746

Warm, muggy evening! Supposed to stay warm for a few days. Today was bearable, but warm.

Reading the Anaya book, Jalamanta. In one of the early chapters, a man is brought back to health with food and rest. The food described (goat's milk and cheese, figs, honey, and so forth) is amazingly similar to the foods listed in the Restoring Your Digestive Health book. Coincidence!

My digestive progress continues. I still feel that the arabinogalactans were the tipping point. Since I've been taking that supplement, I've been on a steady track. The AG is good for both immune system support and digestive help. Seems to be working!

Slept a lot today, waking up just about each time I'm supposed to eat. Feeling well, but still no super energy surges. Have clarity (energy) when I awake in the mornings up through my walk (did walk today) and often later in the day (around 8pm or so), but seem to need to sleep/eat all other times. Don't even read a lot during that middle period each day. I did go shopping today after my walk, but then had to sleep when I returned. I did that intentionally to see what would happen--I had to sleep more in the afternoon it seemed.

Oh, well! I trust that my body/spirit is working things out! I've had six months of rest--what a luxury! But it's time to awaken! So be it!

5747

Last night, as I went to bed, I had a surge of clearness. It was like the way I felt last week on two separate days, just not as extended. I'm sleeping deeply and the sleep seems to be opening windows of clarity.

I awoke today and as I completed my morning rituals (sans walk), I got a call from my daughter. Her car had died and she needed a ride to work. Picked her up and took her to work and came back and fell into my sleep/eat cycle for the day. As I said I slept deeply. Right through the mowers and blowers. Did make it to the library today--I had power-read my way through the books I picked up last week.

P had given me a set of Antioch Reviews. In a recent edition, I scanned the fiction section and noticed a story by Jan Pendleton. The name rang a bell. She had run an improv group that my daughter had attended. I checked the bio info and sure enough it was the same Jan. Glad to know that she has been published. Her story in that edition, called Boarders, is well done. Go, Jan!

I picked up another Anaya book plus a collection of Raymond Carver tales. The library is wonderful! A nearly inexhaustible supply of imaginings!

5748

Hate to say it, but another sleep(y) day! Got up, got started, but then went into "nap" mode. Awoke for meals, but slept deeply in between. Maybe portends some healing work being done.

P stopped by and brought some delicious fresh figs. They went well with some cheese for my final food stop a few minutes ago.

Looked up Byron Katie's site (www.thework.com). Interesting stuff--called The Work! It involves asking of yourself four questions and then a turn-around query --

1. Is it true?
2. Can you absolutely know that it's true?
3. How do you react when you believe that thought?
4. Who would you be without the thought?
...and then turn it all around!

Her site has an interactive (free) section where you can "journal" answers to your questions. The site prompts you through the process and provides helpful hints and examples. Her story of her "awakening" (and how she received The Work) can be found on the site.

Digestion is holding steady--coming up on three weeks without a problem! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Sounds like a question for The Work!

5749

Another sleepy day! Or rather, a day of sleep! Had to lie down and sleep multiple times today. Managed to get to the store for some needed items, but came back and crashed after that...

Got a note from Rebecca regarding the 3rd chakra and what happens when it's compromised. The material is from a friend of her's who's got Rebellious Qi. He picked the description up from a newsgroup. It certainly describes my experience of what's happening in that area of my body--

The Third Chakra

When individuals experience difficult times, they often find that they possess a previously undiscovered reservoir of strength. In ancient Vedic texts, the third, or Manipura chakra (when healthy) is the seat of that strength, bolstering courage and determination in times of stress and uncertainty. This chakra radiates from the base of the sternum, governing our emotions, will, and ego. When balanced, it blesses one with a profound drive to succeed, authority, integrity, and self-respect. It is active, rather than passive, and helps in the achievement of tasks both great and small. The Manipura chakra may be visualized as a bright, cheerful yellow and is associated with the sunflower and amber.

Because of its connection to the ego, when the third chakra is in a depleted state, it is common to experience feelings of inadequacy, doubt, and rejection; depression and lethargy; and intense worry. Too much energy focused in the area leads to the desire to exert inappropriate control over one's environment. A well-developed Manipura chakra empowers you to grow in positive ways and inspires you to act on your desires. It is possible to exert a balancing influence over the chakra by bringing fire into your life in the form of candles or hearth fires, wearing yellow clothing, and doing exercises that strengthen the muscles of the abdomen and teach you to breath deeply using the diaphragm. You can stimulate an under-active third chakra by burning cinnamon or carnation incense, using peppermint or lemon essential oils and Ginkgo biloba or milk thistle, and exposing the chakra to tiger-eye. The simplest and most potent method of opening and energizing the chakra is relaxing your emotional center. Laugh and cry more often, let yourself be more sensitive, and embrace your raw emotions.

Living with a repressed Manipura chakra is like existing automatically, without vitality. Its qualities can be the cause of overwork and excessive perfectionism, but this chakra is more often the seat of free will, goals, personal power, and decisiveness. When nurtured, it can lead you to new heights of spirituality and balance in all aspects of your life.

5750

Sleepy day! Came back from morning walk and went to pick up some food items and that's been it. I've slept on and off all day--even through some heavy noise cycles here in the complex. So goes the flows!

Started reading Anaya's set of tales by a character Serafina. Twelve stories within the overall story framework of the book--a variation on a 1000 and 1 Arabian Nights or Scheherazade--but set in New Mexico during the 1600's. Clever idea! So far, well done.

Started reading a collection of SciFi tales by Kit Reed. Can't get into them. Her writing style is very odd and disjointed. Will try a few more, but don't hold out that I'll be able to finish that one.

Street fair in downtown PA today and tomorrow! Same-old, same-old! Week days and weekends mush together, become seamless tunnels. One leads to the next with no markers or roadsigns. Just an array of light and darkness in a never changing pattern. Had two days this week that were noticeably different! May there be more! May that be my reality!

5751

Read Voodoo Heart, a collection of stories by Scott Snyder. Stephen King wrote the cover blurb extolling the fact that he couldn't put the book down once he started reading. I did the same even though I thought I wouldn't. His work is quirky and very rich--rich in detail, in story, and in the unexpected. So many good writers!

Today was not as "energetic" as the previous two days, but was still slightly above the norm. I ended up having to sleep more today and the symptoms were more present. Got an email today regarding a workshop about remaining neutral--no matter what takes place, the key is to stay neutral. I can understand that. It was great to have had two days of higher energy, but I don't need to get into a funk because today wasn't like the previous days. Remain neutral! The path of the buddha, the path of beingness.

Digestion remains steady! May it continue to be so! I'm a bit concerned that I'm still losing weight. I've been eating slightly bigger portions, but I'm still worry. The food I'm eating is rich and I've started using more coconut oil. The stuff grows on me! At first it was a bit strange putting oil on my dishes, but I'm getting used to it.

L's been really busy. With my weird diet and her late hours, we haven't seen a lot of each other this week. She's been eating on the run. Hopefully, she's going dancing tonight to give herself a break.

PA street fair this weekend! Walked the event last year, but not sure what I can manage this go round. Can't eat anything there (except ice cream or such) and would have to carry food with me. Probably will pass on it this year unless I experience an energy bubble. We shall see!

Neutral! Middle of the road! Stay on course! Let the good times roll!

5752

Another good day! May there be more! Thank you!

Like yesterday, I just felt better today--more energetic, less into symptoms. No particular reason for the change except I feel like I'm assimilating my food better. Like a metabolism switch flipped and I'm now getting nutrients from what I'm eating. Still sticking with dairy/fruit. Still starting to crave other types of food, but will continue to give my system a rest for now.

I ran out of supplements yesterday/today. Feels like I'm missing something when I sit down to eat not having a pile of capsules to take. Should hear from Rebecca soon about next steps on the supplement trail.

Read a book of short stories by Rudolfo Anaya, The Man Who Could Fly. Beautifully written and crafted tales. There are so many good writers writing short stories now. A really rich set of choices of things to read.

I feel good about the subtle shift that seems to be taking place with my symptoms. I feel that as long as I continue to eat prudently and well that the shift will continue and magnify. May that continue to be my reality! Blessings for all!

5753

Interesting day! After yesterday's sleep-a-thon (sort of), I made it today with just 2 naps/rests. I still didn't get much more accomplished, but I just didn't feel the need to crash as much.

Got an email from my son in LA. My daughter-in-law has been restricted to bedrest for the remainder of her pregnancy. I joked with him in my reply that she and I were doing the same things--sleeping, eating, taking an occasional shower, and in her case surfing the internet and shopping--I tend to read more than surf. She's got about 10 weeks ahead of her. I've put her in my thoughts and prayers.

My digestion remains fairly normal. It's been two weeks since I had an episode. Thank you! I've been reading more in the Restoring Your Digestive Health book. He talks in there about using probiotics with HSO's (homeostatic soil organisms)--the big guns for the digestive track. I think I'm going to add some to my supplement pile. I'm getting some from the fermented foods I'm eating (yogurt, kefir, quark, buttermilk, etc.), but I believe I could use some support to fully normalize my system. Looks like they carry those supplements at Whole Foods. Will check it out.

Today was a relatively quiet day! My two naps were undisturbed by any noise or such.

I contacted the PDTeam and asked them to set up my next six treatments. They're getting busy; they're being contacted by people from all over the world. Good for them; good for the people who seek them out. Good (God) for all!

About time to do some horizontal time with the Humee-hum chant for my 3rd chakra. And then to dreamland, sweet and full!

5754

Day of sleep! Eat, sleep, eat, sleep! The rhythm of the day. Guess it was some kind of recovery from yesterday's adventure--the trip over to SC for a treatment. While there, I stepped on a scale--I lost a couple of pounds from about a month ago. I would rather have gained a couple, but I'll settle for no more big drops. Rebecca suggested that I consume more coconut oil to bump up my daily calorie count. Have started doing so. Will also increase portion sizes some as well.

Session went ok. I was in some kind of anxiety space that I couldn't shake. It was only near the end of the session that I grew still and quiet. It happened after Rebecca led me through a guided meditation involving energy flows and the chakras.

What became clear to me is that I've put a lot of attention on the physical side of things. And perhaps not enough on the spiritual/emotional issues. I've been "waiting" for the physical symptoms to go away/change and they persist (tremor, digestion and energy levels).


Meanwhile, I grow weary of my current (physical) surroundings and the noise levels/noises. Yesterday, I managed to get still at the end of the session. That was due in part to the quiet place where we were working. There are periods of quiet here, but there's a lot of ambient noises and sounds. A persistent babble! It's no excuse, but it has affected me and I'm going to have start looking for my next (quiet) place.

Even as I write, there's a gaggle of kids in the courtyard making kid noises. They quiet down after a while when it's time to eat. It would be fine if I had the energy to interact with them and play games, but I don't!

Six months coming to an end since I moved here. I find it difficult to see what I've accomplished over that amount of time--except got a lot of sleep and lost some weight (what a lot of people probably wish they could do). Otherwise, I feel like I've been in stasis.

I was reading yesterday that some scientists have verified the existence of dark matter. Aside from the technical details, they mentioned that 75% of the universe is composed of dark energy, 20% is composed of dark matter, and 5% is ordinary matter. Perhaps my last six months were spent in an alternate universe in the dark sphere. It's the only plausible explanation!

Kids are gone! It's back to just ambient noises (traffic and such)! Nap time (or is it time to eat)?

5755

Had a treatment session today. Was a somewhat mixed result. I kept drifting and my thoughts would not still. Ended with a good visualization of just energy flowing through my body--with a solid sense of joy and peace. Just took the whole session to get to those final moments.

Getting late tonight and I'm a somewhat mushed out from the afternoon. More in the morrow!

5756

Tomorrow I head over to SC for a treatment. I feel slightly better than I was feeling two weeks ago at this time. Not huge changes in energy levels, but some. Digestion still normalized. Enjoying the quark (thick, sour-cream-like cheese). Looking into "primitive" diets, which are related to the diet in the Restoring Your Digestive Health book.

L and I went for an ice cream today. While there, a young Japanese-looking young man rode up on a bicycle loaded with travel gear. He was coming from Anchorage, AL and was headed to Los Angeles. What a trek! What a feat! He was carrying a laptop and pulled it out to link into the free WiFi connection. I wish I had asked him for his blog (I assume he's keeping one). Could have "traveled" with him for the remainder of the journey.

Neighbors were noisy this morning. Around 7AM they were banging pots and pans in the kitchen and using the water systems, which are noisy in their own way. Reinforced my thinking of moving to a quieter place/location. Too much ambient noise in this neighborhood! Fortunately, there are enough quiet times so that I can nap/sleep/meditate, but I could do with more. We shall see! We shall see!

Time for a food installment. Then my evening spiral toward bed. Go Tiger! I think I dreamed about him for some reason last night. In the dream, he looked like a tiger!

5757

Picked up some quark today. It's like a thick sour-cream cheese. Quite tasty! Somewhat like ricotta, but not as dry and bland. It was one of the products mentioned in the book, Restoring Your Digestive Health. My digestion has been stable for a bit over week. I'll go by the health food store tomorrow and see if they carry other items that the book mentions. I'm sure they have nearly everything at the store over in SC. I can look there when I go over on Monday.

Slept in a bit later this morning. Sky was overcast and it seemed earlier than it was. Felt good when I awoke and afterwards when I did my exercises, made a smoothie, and went for a walk. Still a bit tired after walk, but went shopping anyway and then came back and slept. Have been alternating short naps between reading, eating, and resting some.

There was a big celebration at the temple down the street. It started last night and continued throughout most of today. I could hear people singing, cheering, and ululating. Perhaps it was a series of marriage ceremonies. Mazel Tov!

Day winds down. L went dancing last night and is going again tonight. I look forward to getting back on the dance floor in the Fall--when the next series of classes begin--energy levels willing!

Had a dream night before last where I was with a group of people being interviewed for a project. Most of the people in the group were people I'd worked with at SRI. We were all young-looking like we were just out of college. I was to be interviewed by a woman named Pearl. I was trying to get into the interview a day early for some reason. I wasn't successful and was going to have to wait. Note: "Pearl" is my mother's middle name--Theresa Pearl.

Last night's dreams escaped back into dreamland! Perhaps to replay tonight!

5758

L sent me a link to a product called Goatein (goat milk protein). On the site there were references to a book called "Restoring Your Digestive Health"... The book was in the library and I picked it up...

It's written by a person, who's a naturopathic physician, and a medical doctor, who specializes in GI disorders... The naturopath cured himself of Crohn's disease using dietary interventions... There's a photo of him at the worst part where he weighed 104 lbs (he's 6' 2") and another when he had restored himself back to 175 lbs...

The book is well written and really clear regarding the dietary protocols... Turns out, I'm doing some of the things already (drinking kefir, buttermilk, using goat's milk yogurt, coconut oil, etc.)... I spent the afternoon reading through the parts of the book that apply to me... Looks very promising as a roadmap of where to go next... Thanx to the Goatein link!

I'll say more about the dietary suggestions and protocols once I read through them again and pick out what seems applicable to me. The gist of the diet revolves around what people ate before there was agriculture. It involves a bit more protein (Goatein), selected carbohydrates and fats, plus making sure the food products are organic/natural/or as healthy as possible. But more on all of that later.

The author's description of what he endured before coming onto the diet that reversed his disease makes him the Lance Armstrong of Crohn's disease. It's an incredible story--he tried dozens of "cures" and programs--many of which put him closer to death. He survived, restored and is now helping others recover from GI disorders.

5759

Day of slightly more energy, but still had to sleep. Made it to the library--several of the many books I had were starting to become due. I couldn't renew some that were on hold. So I took most of them back. And, of course, picked up some others.

Hearing from some people on the F&F list regarding my latest health update. Several people sent me the names of people they are using for health/spiritual work. I appreciate their thought and caring.

The land line rings! I just put that number on the Do Not Call list. Should reduce the number of telemarketing calls that bombard that number. I have an answering machine, but they almost never leave a message. Computers talking to computers!

Tonight feel like I still didn't sleep enough today. But also felt like I had more energy. Paradox? Not really--I seem to have a bit more energy and I could use more sleep--if that be possible.

More sleep! More dreams! I keep having dreams dealing with past events. I don't seem to recall them when I awake, but there have been quite a few over the past few weeks. The Source speaking to me? Perhaps! Maybe more tonight!

5760

Received my Mac Office software today. Now have all the tools needed for the Algebra project. Took a while to install software--0.5GB of stuff. Looks like Word opens the Appleworks files with no problems, so all is groovy!

Slept a lot today! Still feel logy despite the extra naps.

Haven't read much over the past two days. Learned today that auto dealer where I got my truck, and where I get it serviced, has been closed. Too bad! It was just down the street within walking distance. Now have to go to Sunnyvale for service. Grrrrr! Everything changes!

Feel like going horizontal! So that's it for today! Adios!

5761

Days are getting darker earlier each night. The sun was setting at this time a few months ago. But now Fall rushes forward and will soon be here.

Day went like most others. The TI calculator that I need for the Algebra project arrived safely. Amazon and UPS failed to get a new software package delivered--it's promised for tomorrow now.

Digestion has been on an even keel for a week now. Perhaps the IAG supplement is helping regulate things--hope so! What's IAG? Long chain polysaccharides from the larch tree that are called arabinogalactans (Google this word for details). The name makes me think of space ships!

Didn't get enough naps today. Feeling tired and ready for an early sleep. Good night, galactans, wherever you are!

5762

Update note sent to F&F re my state of health--
***********************************

Hi all--
It's been a bit over 3 months since I sent out an update on what's happening in my recovery process. Recently, several of you mentioned that fact so I felt that I should try and bring everyone up to date.

For most of the last three months I've been wrestling with the following two issues: my energy levels and my diet and associated digestive disorders. To address these issues, I've done a 3-day cleansing fast followed by a 21-day cleansing/detox diet, had a 15-item test based on saliva samples for adrenal-related functions (which found definite problems), and have been taking a of daily host nutritional supplements.

My energy levels began dropping throughout May and June. I could make it through each day, but I had to rest/sleep a lot and cut back on my dance and yoga classes. I seemed to have bottomed out in late June/early July, and have been feeling a bit more energetic over the past few weeks.

The energy level drops were not unexpected based on the PDTeam's materials and experiences. I, of course, didn't think it would happen to me. The PDTeam has indicated that I'm somewhat ahead of the curve in terms of my overall recovery, but that I can't push the process. If I'm tired, I need to rest/sleep/do whatever my body wants.

The other issue of diet and digestion has been the most bothersome item over the past months. The illness is called "Rebellious Qi in the Stomach Channel" with good reason. My digestive system seemed to have nearly stopped working. I was eating, but losing weight because the nutrients were not being assimilated. In addition, I was (and still am) frequently experiencing episodes of serious constipation.

To make a long story short, I'm currently on a fairly "soft" diet of fruits and dairy. It's not an ideal diet, but it seems to minimize (but not eliminate) digestion problems, seems to be giving my digestive track a breather, and I've stopped losing weight. My morning "meal" is a smoothie made with a banana, blueberries, prune juice, pineapple juice, kefir, brewer's yeast, malted milk, and rice protein powder.

In my "spit" test, I displayed allergic reactions to eggs and soy products. I tested ok on dairy and grains (gliaden). These results could change once I normalize my system.

Basically, for the last three months I've been eating (with lots of experimentation in this area), sleeping (well, thank goodness), reading (a lot), eliminating (with occasional difficulties), and learning how to pray effectively (hopefully). I've been driving over to Santa Cruz every other week for treatments, and going over on alternate weeks (usually) to confer with the nutritionist.

Every morning, I get up and do my Qigong exercises, drink my smoothie and head out for a brisk 1.2 mile walk. When I complete my walk, I usually need to sleep/rest. So goes the remainder of the day--do something (eat, read, shop, laundry, etc.) and then nap/rest. I still post a daily note in my blog (laranstar.blogspot.com) most nights before I go to bed.

Recently, Bob Albrecht (the person who got me involved with microcomputers and writing books) proposed that I work with him on the creation of some Algebra materials that will be posted on the web. I'm gathering the tools (hardware and software) that will let me work on that project with him. Should be able to start later this week.

I don't know how much longer it will take for me to be functionally "recovered." I'm grateful that my symptoms are not as extreme as I've seen in others (and I pray that their symptoms recede). My digestion disorders, which are a function of the illness, are where I'm spending most of my cycles right now--that and looking for ways to restore my energy levels. I'm (extremely) well rested; my stamina is limited (for now).

I seem to be able to read most everything and comprehend it (but not remember it very well--so what's new with that?). My thoughts get a bit mushed when I'm interacting with someone (a sales person, a conversation, etc.), but seem to be clear when I write (like now--I assume that what I've written is clear!). I'm ok driving, but I keep an eye on what I'm doing for other's sake. I'm not as facile (now) in handling multitasking situations as I once was.

I hope this update gives you a sense of my current state and situation. It's somewhat difficult for me to "see" myself since I'm in the middle of the muddle. Hopefully, my next update will contain reports that say I have made progress with increasing my energy levels and that my digestion is in order. May that be my reality! Be well, everyone!

Oh, yes! I turned 67 this month! How did I get to be that age? I'm too young to be 67!

5763

Spiritual Madness--a set of audiotapes by Caroline Myss (pronounced "mace")--loaned to me by my friend P. I just listened to Side 1 of the 1st tape. Very relevant to where I am at this time and as I've been working with the Dyer materials--incredible overlap!

She spoke about the initial steps of the journey and letting go of any expectation that hitting the path of Spirit will reduce the chaos. More likely the opposite--that more mystery, more chaos will manifest. Divine logic does not correspond to people logic--surrender and let go (let God) and dive in.

She also spoke about having to step into the unknown, into the aloneness--which is exactly what I've created for myself. I have helped create the perfect situation in which to take myself deeper into the mysteries. No accidents! Distractions are minimal, especially if I let go of future, imagined events as L was saying earlier today. Now! Now! Now!

I'm reading, getting and hearing almost the identical messages from multiple sources. Guess that's how the Source is "talking" to me right now. The ball is in my soul-court! I'm learning!

5764

I've been power-reading my way through Wayne Dyer's latest book, Inspiration: Your Ultimate Calling. Lots of good thoughts and ideas in it on the topic of living an inspired life--living in-Spirit. I'm learning a lot about myself as I read each chapter--about what it takes to live from a place of being in touch with joy, peace, love and well-being. The last item is especially relevant for me--recapture my sense of well-being... It's on its way...and hopefully even more of it than I had before...

Awoke feeling energetic. Did morning rituals and rested. Made an excursion to the post office and store, but never generated enough energy to get out again. Slept, rested, read and ate. Wasn't that hungry, but ate anyway--have to keep stoking the engine.

After reading one part of the Dyer book, I tried to recall my big moments of bliss and joy. Many of them also involved a lot of tension and worry. I discovered that I've only had a few "uncontaminated" moments of pure bliss. Like some times with my daughter. Like a time I was walking by myself in the woods. I had quite a few others that were always intertwined with tension, fear, upset, worry, and so forth.

It's like the tension I'm feeling now with this illness was always there in all that I did. It was there like a shadow next to me, covering me as I did things. So what I did, what I accomplished, was always "contaminated" no matter the result. The associated joy and bliss was never fully acknowledged or experienced.

Gives me much to ponder...much to look at and to reexamine!

5765

Dyer's book, Inspiration: Your Ultimate Calling, is a rich work. Finding lots of good thoughts and ideas in what he's written--what he's been inspired to write. His driving 20 miles and back to shop at Cosco on Maui turns out to be an adventure in bringing inspiration to several strangers. Amazing intention, awareness and generosity on his part.

I ordered MS Office. It will arrive next week. Need to have it so that I can work with my Dragon-friend on some online Algebra materials. Will shop for a small printer tomorrow. Will be good fun to work with him again.

Energy level was up a bit today. Using Dyer's suggestion to focus more on well being than on healing--becoming a well being magnet. Good (God) book! Lots of inspiring words.

Week ends! But the beat goes on--and on and on and on!

5767-5766

(Somehow, I missed making a post for Tuesday. Don't have a clue how I did so!)

Another day, another constipation! Despite the softer diet and the smaller portions of food, I still had another impaction episode today. It was not as bad as with more fibrous foods, but still was a problem. Not sure what to do beyond what I've done. Stick with the softer, simpler diet and realize that I will get periodic problems. Will check in with Rebecca and see what she suggests. Will also look up the senna paste recipe that I read about--make some and start using it. Here's what it looks like--

Take a 4 ounces package of Senna Tea. Senna Tea is a traditional medicinal called Smooth Move. Put the Senna tea in 3 cups of boiling water. Steep for 5 min. Add the Senna tea to a large pot Next, add 1 pound pitted prunes, 1 pound raisins, 1 pound figs. Boil tea and fruit for 5 minutes. Remove from heat and let cool. Add 1 cup of lemon juice.

Use a blender to mix to a smooth paste. Place in glass container. Store in freezer. Paste will not freeze but will keep for a long time. Use 1 or 2 Tablespoons daily. This can be done several ways including spreading it on toast.

Yummmm! In looking for the recipe, I also came across a helpful paper that's on a PD site--

http://www.parkinson.org/site/pp.asp?c=9dJFJLPwB&b=238639

They make some interesting distinctions in the paper regarding what causes the problems.

Part of the problem today may be related to heat--it got fairly muggy/warm today. Really noticeable after the few cool days we had... Onward and onward...

5768

Coolness finds its way to the area! But things were reversed. It was warmer at the beach than it was here in PA. Global weirdness.

Treatment session felt really balancing and healing. I fell asleep on the table at one point. When I awoke, I thought I was home. Took me a few moments to realize that I was still in SC.

We worked on my chakras. Chris needled me in several places that deal with the chakras and the various organs and systems (digestive, for example). It felt like we did a lot of work; aligned energies and flows. I still feel great despite the somewhat long and difficult drive back.

I'm feeling positive about my somewhat strange diet (dairy/fruit). The couple of odd things I ate this weekend (pecan bar, cheese soup, and banana cream cheesecake) seemed to have been assimilated. The things I eat that are on my "list" are tasty, healthy, rich and satisfying. Hopefully, I'm getting the nutrients now that my digestive system has had a rest and isn't overwhelmed with trying to process lots of different foods.

Chris talked briefly about the acupuncture points he used and how they were related. He spoke of the Five-Elements that are used to delineate the various aspects of a person's makeup. In searching for some resource that talked more about what he mentioned, I came across this site. This page contains a detailed discussion of what Chris was working on with me--

http://www.5elements.com/docs/elements/fire.html

I have deficient Fire, which is what he worked on to help correct today. It all makes sense! It makes a lot of sense! I need to attend to my Fire!

5769

Birthday 67 today! 67! How did I get to be this old? I'm too young to be this old! August 6, 1939 was a long time ago!

Celebrated with a piece of banana cream cheesecake at the Cheesecake Factory. Also had a bowl of cheese soup so I stayed close to my dairy/fruit diet.

Been in mixed-mode all day today. I've read, slept, eaten, walked, and sat a lot. Having lots of thoughts around the material I'm reading in the Dyer book, my inner musings and contemplations, my age, my state of being, and so forth.

My friend P called to wish me Happy Birthday. We ended up talking about the book she took with her on Wednesday--The Law and the Promise by Neville Goddard. I pulled up his web site (one dedicated to his work). There is a photo of Neville on the home page when he was younger. He looks like Jimmy Smits of NYPD Blue fame. Amazing similarity!

The site has articles about Neville and his works that aren't found elsewhere. Noticed that in looking at his site I started "imagining" alongside the Dyer materials--like I said today was mixed-mode.

Called my youngest sister and wished her a Happy Birthday. Her celebration day is tomorrow.

Here's what the world was like (in monetary terms) on August 6, 1939--
Bread:$0.08/loaf
Milk:$0.49/gal
Eggs:$0.58/doz
Car:$750
Gas:$0.19/gal
House:$6,416
Stamp:$0.03/ea
Avg Income:$1,837/yr
Min Wage:$0.30/hr
DOW Avg:150

My monthly Social Security check is nearly what the Average Income was back then. My mother worked as a waitress for less than the Minimum Wage (since she got tips). What was it like to work for 25 cents an hour?

Anyway, it's mixed-mode day. Off to SC get a treatment in the morrow. Will be in Chris's good hands. Haven't had a session with him for a while. 67! Working on 68! May this next year be one of health and joy--for everyone!

5770

Reading a Wayne Dyer book, Inspiration: Your Ultimate Calling. Very "inspirational" work--worth the read. Power of positive thinking plus alignment with Spirit. Nothing really new, but very readable and motivating.

My full healthy state is already on its way. It will manifest right on time. It will include more of an abundance of health than I can now imagine. So be it!

As I've noted in previous posts, I'm experiencing bubbles of energy in between naps and rests. Something is starting to change! Oh, yeah!

Dreams last night about spying--intricate, involved, convoluted scenes dealing with the unraveling of various plots and schemes. Entertaining dreams!

Well, the word came in today on Landis--his sample B also showed evidence of him having used exogenous drugs on the day of his great recovery. Too bad! Won't be able to step into Lance's shoes. His rides are over, for now!

L returned from Finland last night. She missed a connecting flight in NY and had to stay there overnight. It was warm in NY--the same heat wave that we had several days ago. They put her in a room with no AC, which didn't work. They had to move her to a room with a working AC unit before the night was over. The fun of traveling!

Even though I slept for nearly 2 hours this afternoon, I'm still a bit sleepy tonight. Time to head back into dreamland.

5771

Had dreams last night, but don't recall what they were about. They fell back into dream space.

Awoke with my usual morning surge of energy. After a walk, fell back into my nap/rest patterns interlaced with dishes of food. Another day in limbo.

It's as if I'm in this Groundhog's Day movie, repeating things over and over. Each day is similar to the previous/next days--repeated and repeated. I'm now into my sixth month here in the apartment. Six months have nearly passed since I arrived and fell into the abyss.

It seems like I'm budding a bit of new energy, but it's difficult to tell. I'm repeating days and nights with no breaks, no variations, no surcease (whatever that may be).

Almost time for my final food installment for the day (other than a bowl of ice cream a bit later tonight. I'm ready for a shift, a change, a breakthrough--may it be so! I am wearing grooves in my psyche, ruts in my spirit!

5772

The Rigpa site had the following "glimpse" posted today --

When the sun of fierce devotion shines on the snow mountain of the master, the stream of his blessing will pour down.

The Tibetan Saint, DRIKUNG KYOBPA

Been trying to produce that fierce devotion. I think there are a few clouds shadowing my sun.

Today seemed like a l-o-n-g day. Time seemed to pass slowly.

Had a series of dreams last night. One involved walking along a trail near a museum. I had walked the trails before and knew how they doubled back on themselves, but I still got turned around. But, there wasn't any pressure to be anywhere so I just meandered and got lost.

I was walking with a friend, RB. He and I were to meet up with another person--a business partner. He was working out a lease on a storefront in the museum complex. There was some problem with the previous tenant having unpaid utility bills that we were having to clear.

There were other dream segments, but this is the only one that I recalled. It was noticeably noisy here today--lots of construction activity. I still managed to nap/rest through some of it.

Felt really energetic this morning. After a walk, I lost some of the energy bubble. May it return in the morrow!

5773

Mixed energies today! Slivers of new energies were thinner today, but still faintly present. A friend, P, dropped by and brought me a stack of audio tapes. I listened to one tape on "focusing." I fell asleep near the middle so will have to listen to it again to learn what I heard while I slept.

I just recalled that I've been having rather extensive dreams lately. I've just not kept them conscious and written them up. Last night, there was a part of the dream where I was on a panel with Peter Jennings (deceased) and Morrie Safir (alive?). We were interviewing someone, a celebrity perhaps. I had done a lot of research on the person and had a host of pointed questions ready to be asked. But for some reason, Jennings and Safir overshadowed me. I was not well known and looked and felt "small" next to them and in the situation. I was uncomfortable and kept letting them run the interview.

The dream was part of a set of three dreams--I don't recall the details of the other two. I just recall that they were stark and dark in some ways.

I'll start putting my dreams back into my notes--as I can recall them. It's been a while since I've recorded any dreams. I've had them, but have not focused on writing them up (or down).

P also ordered some CDs of the chakra meditations for me. I did those exercises again today using the book that they are in--it will be handier to do them by listening to the CDs.

I feel a bit tired tonight. May hit the bed early--or take a nap and get up later to read. I'm also feeling a bit frazzled for some reason. Things are on my mind! Like the future and what I will be doing, where I'll be living, how I will be getting along, and such. So much is so unclear!

5774

Slivers of energy! Sparks of delight! Day was a mix of states, but still felt like there was slightly more energy than there has been.

Started using the IAG supplement today (long-chain polysaccharides like in the aloe vera). Should help restore some of the flora/fauna in my saliva, which is weak according to the spit test I took. It's the stuff that helps break down food and makes it assimilable in the gut. Anyway, I'm now ingesting 2 teaspoons of it each day along with aloe vera juice. Will cut back on the juice some so I don't overload my system.

Did the 3rd chakra pranayama exercises again tonight. They feel right! And I can work them in later in the day or evening without a lot of stress. Will keep on with everything and see if the slivers of energy grow and expand. Let that be my reality!